Why I Am Not A SAHM

I am going to address a topic that is really hard for me to talk about on my blog today...

I am not a stay at home mom. I was the first 19 months of Moses' life and the first 4 of Emery's. I actually only planned on staying home for the first year of Moses' life and going back to work part time, but God had different plans. When Moses was six months old we moved to Southern California when Jarrell accepted a job at Forest Home. We quickly realized the cost of living in California was very high compared to what we were used to and I started looking for part time jobs immediately. I never found a job and I was thankful in a lot of ways because I found out I was pregnant with Emery and wanted to honor the commitment I made to myself to stay at home with Moses for a year, but it was so hard on our family. A job came along for me that was literally PERFECT for me, but it was (and had to be) full time. I knew that this is where God wanted me to be, but it was so hard for me to go back to work.

It has taken me a long time (I have been working for ten months) to be content with my situation. It is not easy for me to leave in the morning and there are so many days that I just want to cuddle up with my babies and call in sick. Days like today help me realize that my job is important, purposeful, and worth the sacrifice. I am truly blessed to work in a ministry that serves 800+ churches in Southern California. I get to see God work in amazing ways through peoples' lives every single day. I get to see God restore broken people. I get to work with an amazing team of people that have answered God's call to serve Him and I get to witness them use the talents that He has given them for His glory. I get to lead a team of people that passionately love God and though they aren't perfect, they love deeply, strive to be better, and teach me how to be a better version of myself everyday. I am thankful for where God has me even though it isn't always where I want to be. God's plan is so much bigger and more purposeful then we can ever begin to imagine. When things aren't going the way you think they should, remember that God is sovereign.

This is a picture of the beautiful place I am blessed to work at...

Just a couple more thoughts...

#1-Please respect working moms. There are so many times that other people (more than likely unknowingly) have made me feel like less of a mother because I don't stay home with my children. They make comments as if I don't want to be with my children or that I have my priorities in the wrong place, which leads me to point number two...

#2-There are so many things we don't know about people, their lives, and situations so don't assume other people's motives. Always believe the best.

#3-Seek to take part in God's Story. It is an adventure full of crazy turns, valleys, mountaintops, and unexpected circumstances but it is worth it.

Proud Mama

Today was a huge day for me and Mimi... Since Mimi was born, she has never successfully stayed in the nursery at church. Well today was the day my friends. I am so proud of her! She cried for about the first ten minutes but then she was fine. {I think her new baby doll helped} I was finally able to sit through a whole church service. She was all smiles when we picked her up.

I think that we may have a future lawyer on our hands. Moses is pretty skilled in negotiation for being two. When he used to ask for something and I would say, "no" he would reply with "just one?" Then I would say, "Zero." It didn't take him long to figure out that he needed more leverage. The other day he asked for something and I said "no" in which he replied, "Just two?" Once again I said, "no" and he replied, "Just one mama?" At that point I had no choice but to give in :) I wonder how long it will take for him to figure out how to ask for more...

This is completely a side note--> It is so crazy how certain songs can invoke such deep emotion in us and even take us back to certain moments in our lives... Are there songs that do that for you?

Mommy & Moses Time

This morning Jarrell decided that he wanted to go to Harry Potter but that wasn't how I wanted to spend my day, so we decided to split up. He took Mimi with him and Moses and I had a little date. We decided to check out the animals at Petco and he was especially fond of the birds, specifically the blue one. I am constantly amazed at the rapid pace in which Moses is learning. He asks questions about everything that is going on around us and is a little sponge.

While we were out I finally found a baby doll for Emery. I have been looking for a soft, mixed doll for a really long time and couldn't find one. A lot of people that I have spoke to about this asked me why I wanted a mixed one so bad. Honestly, I just wanted her to have a doll that looked like her. She absolutely loves the doll and calls her baby. She took her everywhere today and made sure that she had plenty of kisses and hugs :)

Since I got Emery a toy, I told Moses that he could pick a toy. He was so funny, out of all of the choices he chose bubbles that were on clearance! He is definitely a cheap date. It is humbling to see how the littlest things make him so happy and I believe we could all learn to be like him [child like].

We met up after the movie and on the way home Moses was saying the funniest things...

Me {to Jarrell}: Hey Babe

Moses: It's Daddy

Moses: Mimi, where is your baby dolphin? {In reference to her baby doll}

I am tickling Moses and he says, "Enough mama!"

I am so thankful for this beautiful life that I have been given and I want to make the most of each moment, each day. What are some special moments from your day?

Puppies, Jelly Shoes & Art

These things aren't connected at all, just recent happenings in our house:

*It amazes me what kids pick up on-->When we were potty training our puppy Hurley we used to stick out our hand at him and say, "Bad" when he went to the bathroom on the floor. I guess Emery must have seen us do it a lot because she likes to stick out her hand and scream, "bad" when she doesn't like something. It is kind of cute but kind of frustrating at the same time. It drives Moses crazy and he is constantly telling her to stop.

*I absolutely LOVE sales. It is extremely rare that I buy something that is at regular price. Old Navy is having a stock up sale right now and I was able to pick up some cute things for Emery. I got all the clothes and shoes for $25.00! I laughed when I took the picture of all the clothes below because when I found out I was going to have a girl I didn't want very many of her clothes to be pink.

*As I mentioned the other day, our kids are going to a program at our camp in the mornings until we find a nanny. Today Moses was so excited to show me a picture of the craft that he did.

Time of Transition

This week we are completely off our schedule, so it is making life interesting. Our nanny, Kelly, has been with us since I went back to work full time and she left us on Sunday :( We currently have not found a replacement for her. Kelly became so ingrained in our lives that I didn't realize how weird it would be without her here.

Here is a picture of them on St. Patricks Day when Kelly dressed them in green :)

So currently we are using the nursery at camp half days and Jarrell is doing Daddy Daycare for half days :) It is so much fun to hear Moses' stories when I come home from work about his time with Daddy and Mimi. He usually tells me the same things everyday but every once in awhile he adds something new. He loves going to the beach, the pool, the park, and to "see his peoples." Emery is really starting to add more words to her vocabulary too. She calls Moses, "Bubba" which is super cute and now that she is walking she is constantly following him around and wanting to do whatever he is doing.

today.

Even though today wasn't extraordinary I had an amazing day. Some highlights of the day included: Iced White Chocolate Mocha, In-N-Out for lunch, grocery date with Moses, my husband cleaning the house (he even did the dishes!), and cooking one of our favorite dinners.

Emery started walking recently so we decided we needed to get her some walking shoes. We lined up several selections for her and let her pick which ones she wanted. Here is the result:

I had to get these too because they looked

so cute on her l little feet:

She was so excited about them and even fell asleep in the car holding them. When we were transferring her to her crib, she wouldn't let go so we let her sleep with them. Even though she wasn't wearing anything other then a diaper she insisted that she have her shoes on. She must love shoes as much as her mama!

Later in the day, Moses and I went on our grocery shopping date. It is a special time where it is just him and I and he loves to scan all of our groceries in the self checkout line which adds about twenty minutes to our trip, but I love it. Everyone at our neighborhood market know

s him by name and is always giving him treats. On our way to the store we had such a funny conversation...

Me: Moses how old are you?

Moses: Two

Me: How old is Mimi?

Moses: One

Me: How old is Mommy?

Moses: He stops and thinks about it for awhile with a puzzled look on his face and says, "Old!"

He makes me laugh so hard and brings so much joy into my life. I am truly blessed by both of my babies.

When we came home from the grocery store the house was clean and all the dishes were done. I was so excited and it gave me even more motivation to cook dinner. I cooked Pollo Asado with black bean, corn, avocado salsa.

How was your day? What things do you have to be thankful for?

Lions, Tigers and Bears Oh My!

When you live in a forest you tend to have some interesting encounters with the creatures that live here as well. The best part though, is listening to Moses' version of the events that occur.

WILDLIFE ENCOUNTER #1

So about a month ago we were sitting in the living room and heard a bunch of rustling on the porch. I opened the door and much to my surprise this little guy decided to pay us a friendly visit [if you consider eating poopy diapers off someone's porch visiting]...

Moses was actually sleeping but due the the commotion of us screaming and throwing shoes at the bear, he woke up. We shut the door and let him take a peek through the door window and he got super excited and said, "LOOK, baby lion!" I tried to explain to him that it was a bear however he was convinced he was right.

WILDLIFE ENCOUNTER #2

So one of my least favorite things about living in Southern California is...wait for it...the lizards. [I do know to most people that this probably doesn't count as a legitimate complaint]. So they are not big or scary, but they are sneaky, little creatures that scare me constantly. Apparently this has rubbed off on Moses. Today Kelly was taking the kids to the playground at camp and Moses screamed and started crying. Kelly looked down and saw that he was pointing at a lizard. He said, "Zizard scared me! Go away zizards!"

Do you have any fun or scary wildlife encounters?

Girls Are Made of Sugar Spice and Everything Nice

One of my favorite things about having two children is to see how they are similar and how they are different. This is a lot easier now that Emery is getting older. It truly is amazing how unique God created each one of them.

Emery is a mild mannered, content baby who loves her mama {even though she calls me dada}. She has the sweetest little smile, but don't let it fool you, she has a hot temper too-->just like her mama :) She loves to play whether she engages you in peek-a-boo, hide and seek, chase, or making funny faces/sounds. Emery absolutely adores Moses and wants to be just like him. She is a cuddle bug and loves to give hugs and wet kisses. One of my favorite things about having alittle girl is the fact that she LOVES girly things. She is constantly digging through

my jewelry, my makeup, and shoes.

Here are some recent pictures:

Mimi wearing mama headband

Sticking a lot of crackers in her mouth to make brother laugh

Imitating brother using the potty

Showing off her pretty shoes

So happy to be wearing mama's scarf

Fighting with Moses because he is trying to take her scarf

It's Been Awhile

Wow! I haven't posted in forever, since Emery was 10 months old to be exact. She is now 13 (almost 14 months)! I decided that the name of my blog should actually be My Beautiful, CRAZY Life. To be completely honest with everyone, I have lost perspective about life and what it is all about and this is why I am blogging again. I want to take time each day to focus and reflect on the things that mean the most to me {My Jesus, My Family, and My Friends}.

The past week has been full of work but also full of fun. I will give a top five rundown of my favorite memories of this week:

#1- Emery has taken a little bit longer to develop physically than

Moses but she is officially a walker. May I add, the cutest walker ever. She looks like a little zombie because she sticks her arms out in front of her. SO CUTE!

#2- Moses and I went and saw Cars 2 together. It took a little bit of popcorn and candy but he sat through the entire thing (which is a miracle) As we walked out of the movie theater he screamed, "That was fun!"

#3- I ran into an old friend. This doesn't happen much because we live far from most people from the past. It was so fun for her to see how grown up Moses is because she knew me when I was pregnant with him.

#4- Chipotle.Games.Good Company. I had all of my summer residential team over for dinner. I really am blessed by them and it was fun to be able to spend time with them outside of work.

#5- Moses and I went kayaking today and it was so fun.

He looked so cute in his mini lifejacket and oversized paddle. I rarely get to spend one on one time with him and this is an experience that will be burned in my mind forever. As we were walking off the dock he said, "Mama, we just went on an adventure!" I seriously have no idea where he comes up with these things.